I think I have made it a habit to drop by here and pour my inner feelings and emotions whenever I am feeling sad, I should write when I am feeling better too, but such is life and circumstances.
Lately feeling of being lost and not knowing what do to in life surrounds me, but this time something is different, I can see that I am thinking about feeling lost and defeat.
I am aware of the feeling and emotions that are happening to me, yet I am not in control of it.
I am watching them as a bystander, feeling alien to all of it, sometimes the feeling and emotions consume me, other times I am just looking at it still feeling defeated.
Well hope this passes away soon.
Now coming back to our usual order of business, what I have been up to lately?
Well I have spent past few month learning Russian and Drawing (as usual), I haven't been playing any musical instrument lately, Not sure when I will get back to it, but I hope someday I get back to learning some musical instrument, maybe I should start practising harmonica again, Even though I have a lot more time than my peers I feel like I have less of it.
Another thing I have noticed is that I don't really feel close to anyone in this world and that is one of the reason I am trying to pursue and get good at art. Maybe someone somewhere out there can relate to how I feel about the world.
While learning Russian, I learned a lot about learning languages in general, I have enjoyed learning Russian till now, though I haven't practised much since I was relying on my teacher for teaching me and I think that I haven't been my usual self, I usually rely less on others and do things myself. Hope I can get back to practising Russian by myself and rely less on my teacher.
What else huh?, well I like a girl from my Russian class, though I am not sure if I should ask her out or not. I mean I have failed so many times(3?), should I give up or should I ask her out? I am not really sure. I know the worse that can happen is she tell no to me and we move on in different directions. I guess I will ask her out, on the last day of our class in person.
Is life hard or am I making it hard? I don't really know.
Also I am not even sure whether I have gotten good at writing or not, I know I don't know those fancy words, maybe I should learn some of them or a different writing style or read a book or two on writing Meh.
So next is what I have been working on lately.
First is my project https://learntodraw.wiki , I am building learntodraw.wiki to help out newbies learn drawing, hopefully I can gather the will to write an article a week at least for the wiki.
Second is a Year Planner Generator https://pareshchouhan.github.io/year-planner-generator/ , Since i am spending more time off screen (or at least I think I do pffft.) I have made this year planner generator because of lack of a good one.
Third is a chrome extension to download images from wikiart , I used these images to carry out master studies and copy Bargue plates, here's the chrome extension https://github.com/pareshchouhan/wikiart-dl
Books I have read so far
Lately feeling of being lost and not knowing what do to in life surrounds me, but this time something is different, I can see that I am thinking about feeling lost and defeat.
I am aware of the feeling and emotions that are happening to me, yet I am not in control of it.
I am watching them as a bystander, feeling alien to all of it, sometimes the feeling and emotions consume me, other times I am just looking at it still feeling defeated.
Well hope this passes away soon.
Now coming back to our usual order of business, what I have been up to lately?
Well I have spent past few month learning Russian and Drawing (as usual), I haven't been playing any musical instrument lately, Not sure when I will get back to it, but I hope someday I get back to learning some musical instrument, maybe I should start practising harmonica again, Even though I have a lot more time than my peers I feel like I have less of it.
Another thing I have noticed is that I don't really feel close to anyone in this world and that is one of the reason I am trying to pursue and get good at art. Maybe someone somewhere out there can relate to how I feel about the world.
While learning Russian, I learned a lot about learning languages in general, I have enjoyed learning Russian till now, though I haven't practised much since I was relying on my teacher for teaching me and I think that I haven't been my usual self, I usually rely less on others and do things myself. Hope I can get back to practising Russian by myself and rely less on my teacher.
What else huh?, well I like a girl from my Russian class, though I am not sure if I should ask her out or not. I mean I have failed so many times(3?), should I give up or should I ask her out? I am not really sure. I know the worse that can happen is she tell no to me and we move on in different directions. I guess I will ask her out, on the last day of our class in person.
Is life hard or am I making it hard? I don't really know.
Also I am not even sure whether I have gotten good at writing or not, I know I don't know those fancy words, maybe I should learn some of them or a different writing style or read a book or two on writing Meh.
So next is what I have been working on lately.
First is my project https://learntodraw.wiki , I am building learntodraw.wiki to help out newbies learn drawing, hopefully I can gather the will to write an article a week at least for the wiki.
Second is a Year Planner Generator https://pareshchouhan.github.io/year-planner-generator/ , Since i am spending more time off screen (or at least I think I do pffft.) I have made this year planner generator because of lack of a good one.
Third is a chrome extension to download images from wikiart , I used these images to carry out master studies and copy Bargue plates, here's the chrome extension https://github.com/pareshchouhan/wikiart-dl
Books I have read so far
- Art of learning by Josh Waitzkin
- Polyglot: How I learn languages - Kato Lomb
- Power of Now - Eckhart
Lot of other books. You can check my good reads if you want to know what I have read and what I will be reading going forward https://www.goodreads.com/user/show/92904115-paresh-chouhan
Funnily enough, while writing this I forgot all of my worries and problems.
Anyhow, going forward I will be working on my Russian and Drawing and that is it (hopefully), maybe some side projects as well. But you know never know where life takes you so.
до свидания, до скорого, пока пока
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